I’m not sure if I would call this my first Father’s Day or my second. I think technically I became a father when Jackson was conceived. Even though we lost him before he was born, I still consider him my first child. He would have been about 3 months old last Father’s Day.
This Father’s Day is a bit different. I get to celebrate being James’ dad. If you’ve read my previous posts, you know it has been a bit of a struggle. I am not just talking about the struggles and stress of raising a child with so many disabilities. I am also talking about the emotional struggles. I think most expecting fathers, well, at least the ones where it was a planned pregnancy, have these visions of what their kid will be like growing up. The life experiences you want to share with them; the things you want to teach them. And then in an instant, those visions are shattered.
Although James will probably not be able to do many of the things I did when I was growing up, that doesn’t mean that we won’t try to give him his best life. That’s what all dads want for their kids, isn’t it? Don’t we all just want them to be the best that they can be. James will have many limitations as he grows up, but I want to be there to help him through his many challenges.
For a Father’s Day gift, Stacy and James made me an awesome gift that I will cherish forever. It’s a plaster mold of Stacy holding James’ hand. It’s really cool. I think I need to up my game next year. I just got Stacy a card and made her breakfast for Mother’s Day. I’ve got about 10 months to figure it out.
